sixteen months old

My pictures always upload wrong, no matter how hard I try to make them upload in the right order. Guess I should stop trying to get order. This past week I brought Brynn into nursery because I'd forgotten to pack toys and books. As I watched her play, I realized how big she's getting.

From the time I found out she was going to be a little girl, I have been so excited to have my baby with me all the time. It was a hard pregnancy.

And a hard labor (easier them some, harder than others), but while the doctors were trying to get her to take a breath, I realized how much you can care about somebody else. It didn't matter that the doctor was still sewing me up and the epidural was wearing off really quickly while he did it.

It didn't matter that I'd been in labor for 24 hours and was pretty darn tired.

It didn't matter that I hadn't been able to breathe for nine full months...ok, maybe only seven and a half. All that mattered was that she needed to breathe. And when they finally got her to cry, tears came to my eyes. My beautiful baby girl.

I know she's still little, she just seems so big compared to what she was. I love her so much.

As of sixteen months old, she's trying to jump.

• Her brother introduced her to the joys of hopping around, and now she tries to all the time.
• She's now talking non-stop. Not all of it is intelligible, but she still talks as if we all know what she's trying to say. "NMMHMMGHMMTILMMAMAHMM". If anybody can interpret, I'd like to know what she's saying. She is saying things like "daay du" (thank you) "amen" "mama" "hi" "daee"(daddy) "no" (of course) "bye" and "baby".
• She does the funniest thing while she's talking. We've been taking the binky away from her except at nap time and bed time, but she still closes her mouth and mumbles as if the binky is in her mouth. I don't know why, maybe it's the laughter that she gets when she does it.
• She's such a sweet little girl to babies. It surprises me how gentle and loving she is because most kids her age would rather hit than cuddle, but if you show her a baby she will try and hold and love on it and she's really gentle most of the time.
• She's been a mama's girl from the beginning, but she's been really cute recently with coming and sitting on my lap for no reason. I love it.
• She's starting to learn her body parts. Her favorite to point out are her teeth and her tongue. She doesn't say either one yet, but she'll randomly start pointing to them and if you don't notice what she's doing, she'll come over and stand right in front of you and point at them and grunt.

My baby is adorable. I love her so much. I'm so grateful for this gift that Heavenly Father has given me.

so anybody who wants to weigh in...

I've been thinking a lot recently on the timing of when to have another one. I just quit babysitting yesterday (way too much stress and drama) and of course this has brought up the subject of when to start trying. I don't feel ready. I feel so emotionally stressed out that I just want to never do anything again (I hate that feeling). Josh, on the other hand, really doesn't want our kids more than two years apart (which really means I would have to get pregnant this month, hahaha). He's left the choice to me, and I really hate when he does that, because to me it feels like a cop out. But that's a discussion for a different time. My question to everyone out there, how big are the gaps between your kids? Did you find that one was REALLY better than another for them learning how to play and get along? Or was it just different? My stepson and daughter are four years apart, and that is definitely not a gap I want again. I know the two sisters just younger than me used to fight like cats and dogs and they were four years apart. Now they get along beautifully though, so I still have hope for my kids. I was three years from my closest sibling and I feel like that's still an ok age difference for most ages. But never having experienced it as a mother, I'm wondering what it's like from the mother's perspective. I know that ultimately this is my choice, and it's really not a logical one because Heavenly Father will send me another baby when He knows I'm ready (even if I don't feel I'm ready for it again), but I do like putting a lot of thought and research into my decisions (and if my parents are reading this, yes, this is a recent thing...lol). So any feedback would be great! :)

My baby

My baby started saying a few words recently. The movie made me laugh. Sorry it's super dark, there was a lot of light when I took it, but it looks pitch black on the video.

My husband was in a car accident a week ago. This is what our beautiful truck looks like now.

I'm grateful he wasn't hurt and as funny as this sounds, I'm grateful that it was him in his big old truck instead of some poor person in a smaller car. They could have been severely injured if it had been. Instead he walked away with some stiffness.

We're supposed to find out in the next few days whether the insurance company is totaling the truck today. The estimate for repairing it was $11,000. They'll probably total it, but we don't know for sure whether they are yet or not.

I'm surprised that the door didn't just pop right off.

I should have taken a picture of the rental truck Josh gets to drive for now. I'm almost wondering if he begged the guy to hit him just so he could drive something that nice. LOL. Just kidding. I am grateful for the miracles that let us know that Heavenly Father is watching over us.

Do you ever feel...

...like the world is watching, waiting, laughing while you fail?

I do.

Making cookies....

So there comes a time in everyone's life (I'm sure) that you realize that time moves faster than you can possibly know. For me it was the other day. My daughter had been sleeping (taking her nap). When she woke up I went in to pick her up and as she hugged me I thought If I don't take time with her right now, I'm not going to get time later. So I decided to make cookies with her.

As all of you can tell, I'm not great at blogging and so the pics are in the wrong order, but it's ok.

She tried to grab the kitchenaid while it was going. Almost took her hand off.

I love the time I was able to spend with her. Travis was still sleeping and so we were able to spend time just the two of us. Mommy and daughter time.

And she was a great help too. She tried to stir while I was putting more ingredients in (in between trying to take large bites of straight butter). It was an awesome time. I'm so blessed to have my baby girl. I love her so much and am grateful for the time that I have to spend with her and to make our relationship a close relationship.